Alice's First Month ...

Two things I've learned so far:

1. Motherhood isn't easy.
2. You have no clue about anything until you experience it for yourself.

It has been hard for me to fall into the "mother" role. For weeks, I felt I was babysitting. I knew that Alice came from me, but I was still distant from her and the experience! As time goes on, it has gotten better due to co-sleeping and being more confident in calming her (when possible!). And I know she's mine now :)

So to start, Alice has generally slept at night 2-3 hours in a row. It's getting longer and better as the weeks go by. Last night, she slept 3 hours and then 4 hours! Usually it's 3 hours then she's up every 2 hours after that for changing and feeding. Also, it helps if she gets a nap in the afternoon/evening. She tends to sleep better at night.

CRYING. This has been the bane of my existence for weeks! For over 3 weeks, I could hardly put her down because she would SCREAM and WAIL. We finally got a swing from Dave's stepmom, Cindy, and it is my savior! She still has fits, but the swing distracts her attention after a bit and she calms ... and I can cook and clean up like I need to. I don't feel bad putting her in the swing and letting her cry because otherwise I'm just putting her down and letting her cry for a few minutes. This way at least she's in motion. I'm going to have Fisher test her Thursday for colic and reflux just to make sure that isn't a problem. Sometimes she just needs to cry and I don't think it's always in pain but sometimes it is. She's pretty gassy and when she's pushing it out she really gets upset.

Her weight gain has been great! When we left the hospital she was 6 lbs. 9 oz. Week one appointment she was 6 lbs. 13 oz. and week two she was up to 7 lbs. 5 oz. That made me feel better that I knew she was getting enough milk! I started pumping about a week and a half ago. I only was getting an ounce on one at a time but now her demand is going up and I'm generally getting an ounce and a half to 2 ounces now. I really can only pump in the evening because during the day she wants to eat every hour! By evening she slows down. The shield is still my savior but she can take the nip too if need be. The best hold is the football/clutch hold. And I have still to master nursing laying down! She never latches exactly right when we do that ... but at least it keeps her sleeping.

Some firsts:
- She smiled for the first time in the hospital. Most of her smiles the first weeks were fleeting and several were sleep smiles. Last week she finally started mimic smiling more. And when she wakes up on her own she'll smile too!
- Her first restaurant was Saturday and she slept for almost the whole time. I met Dave's family at the Chinese buffet and she was soooo good! Her first time out of the house was the 15th when we went to the doctor's and then to my work to drop off paperwork. Her first store was Target after her 2nd doctor's appointment and she cried the whole time! Needless to say, it was a quick trip!
- Daddy dressed her yesterday for the first time :) She was cute!
- Also, yesterday was the first time Daddy got to feed her a bottle. She ate about 2 1/2 ounces ... and then she slept those 3 hours alone :)
- First bath went well. The warm water calms her down ... but she likes to pee after she gets out LOL
- Her first shower was yesterday with me. Then Daddy took her and dressed her.
- She "laughs" in her sleep. Right now it sounds like hiccup breathing but she's smiling when she does it.
- She had one night of 5 hours of sleep during week 2. It gave me hope but she hasn't repeated it since.
- Her head control is great! She's been lifting her head since week one and by now she holds it up mostly on her own for long periods. Her tummy time is on my chest and she lifts her head quite well and it even rolling herself from tummy to her side in my arms.
- First 3 hours sleeping alone was last night. It went well!

Everyday is better than the last as she grows and becomes more coherent. I look forward to getting actual responses out of her and when she smiles because she's happy and not just mimicking :)